How to have balance in your life, Part I
February 4th, 2008The Balance of Work
Do you ever feel like you are being worked too much? Of course, everyone seems to know when they are being pushed to work too much. How about when you have what you want, but it still isn’t enough? How about when everything is handed to you, money, time, friends, but it still is not enough. What is wrong? Why is there no satisfaction in having what I have always wanted? You don’t have balance in your life.
What is balance anyway? Balance can be defined as having enough work and having enough reward to feel a sense of achievement. We usually can feel an obvious unbalance when we have too much work to do. These can be simple or complex things like cleaning up our dirty clothes, giving the dog a bath, mowing the lawn, doing our taxes, staying late at work, taking on extra responsibility at school, or making meals everyday. These seem like normal tasks, but if there is not balance, these tasks will become burdensome and will bring down your motivation, leading to discouragement. Why is this?
Balance in your life comes from spending your time wisely. Spending time getting chores and work done to achieve tasks and enjoying rewards from those tasks. Enjoying rewards is part of the balance as well. You could easily picture a weight in your right hand representing work, and an equal weight in the left hand representing rewards. For some people its equal, and for others the work side might be heavier. This balance is not a form of Chi or mysterious Asian Medicinal practices, its simply an emotional balance that drives your motivation. I will discuss the motivation side another time. Let’s study the balance of work first. Why are some people happy to work long and hard and others cannot stand it?
Driven
When we work at something, do we feel a mental agony as if it is the last thing we want to do? Do we enjoy it as a simple but necessary thing to do? Do we enjoy it is more than a hobby, like we are driven by it? I can say that I have felt all of these. When I worked as an Engineer making good money, I was in agony. It was a mental struggle to go there and spend my time doing those tasks. I really didn’t have much motivation to do it except for a paycheck. I felt my balance was way off because I worked hard, but the money was soaked up in taxes and insurance leaving just $400 extra each month. Not much considering I was supposed to be making good money as a Professional Engineer. In this case, my work was high, as were my expectations, and my reward was low. I was out of balance.
After this I started learning how to create money from different places; start a business, build something of value and sell it, invest in real estate, form partnerships and networking relationships. I started working harder and harder, but I felt better and better! How could this be? I was working harder with no extra money but feeling better! I started seeing the rewards in my future instead of just in my hand. I started to be able to see a much better situation right around the corner and it was exciting. I had found a balance with my work because the reward was finally balancing my work.
I ended up starting a business, networking with people, buying 2 houses, and learning how to trade the Forex all at the same time as working full-time as an Mechanical Engineer 10 hours a day. I was super busy by my own standards and the standards of most people. I also had two children during this period and obviously had a lot to do! But I felt great, I was learning so much and seeing my rewards materialize in front of me. All this work was driving me to do press on, not to do more, but to do my best at what I was working on. This is the same feeling as a CEO of a major corporation feels when they work 80 hour weeks, the rewards from their hard work drive them! Its a balance that is achieved in the middle of what looks to be madness. My balance was achieved in the middle of all this work which became rewarding and fulfilling. It was my balance.
Basically, when we feel that the reward for the work is sufficient, we feel a balance. Things can throw off the balance such as a pay cut at work with the same responsibilities, a newborn child, an unappreciative spouse, or neglecting a simple ‘Thank You’.
Are you out of balance?
Its easy to feel when the balance has shifted. But how do we know how to find a balance to begin with? Ask yourself these questions regarding your work:
1- How do feel after you complete the work? Do you feel satisfaction or like you wasted your time?
2- Do you feel physically or mentally tired from it? Can you do more, or do you need some downtime?
3- Do you look forward to doing it? Its not rare among people with balance.
4- Would you recommend it to someone else? A good test of whether its a good balance is whether you think other people would agree to do it.
These questions can help you figure out if you are out of balance with your work. Now what do you do if you are out of balance? Try these steps:
1- What would make this work feel reasonable? More pay, more respect, more admiration, more attention? Think about what matters to you and why you do this work.
2- Do I need to take a break more often? If I take breaks, I find that I can work for longer and enjoy it. When is your time to regain energy while you work?
3- How can I make this work easier on me? Do I need to do it differently, or find someone to help me? Am I doing it the hard way?
There are no right answers to these questions because they depend entirely on your situation. Think of ways to improve your work and feel more rewarded doing it. Its a simple exercise that can make a big difference in your daily life because it will bring you closer to a balance. This balance will make you feel energetic, aware, and focused as long as you can maintain it. The balance of work is the first step in achieving a lasting balance. Stay tuned for the next section: The balance of Play.
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